Happy Wednesday Warriors!
We've talked many times about the leap of faith Mark took in starting The Warrior's Will. We've even talked about the frustrations of possibly having to go back to traditional work for him while he waits for this company to grow into a stable income. It isn't his desire to do so, but it might be a necessary reality for him. This brings me to today's topic of choice for the Strength Warrior. Baby steps. Do you find yourself frustrated with the small steps? Do you try to make continuous leaps of faith to keep a hold of that initial success of following your dreams?
What if I told you that baby steps were the foundation of taking leaps when necessary?
I can't get you out of the Matrix, but I can encourage you that the strength it takes to be humble with small progress is totally badass. I am in a similar position where I need to have a job in addition to my freelance writing business. As a recent graduate, I know that it takes a lot of work to get into a new field. I don't even mind hard work. It's always been an essential part of caring for my family. Some people just land in the right spot at the right time, others bust their ass for years with mediocre success. Even though we can't change our random circumstances, such as upbringing or traumatic events, it can be hard not to compare ourselves to others.
I'm sure you've seen this meme around the Word Alchemy page a time or two, but here it is again so that you can reference what I'm about to talk about:
Most of us are aware of the need for baby steps. I can't imagine this post is surprising in any way. But I'm also willing to bet that for those of you who deal with self-hate/doubt, it comes out in the form of feeling like a failure when you don't find success as quickly as others in the same field.
You all know how much I love quoting books. I blame the English degree, haha. There is a series called Burn Notice. I highly recommend it. In this story, two brothers suffer through an abusive childhood. One is the main character and ends up working for the CIA. The other ends up in a life of petty crime and is often making big enough mistakes with criminals that his brother has to step in and save the day.
At one point, the mother asks why one son went on to be successful (which is the societal version of fine) and the other never found a way to be okay again? They had the exact same childhood.
If you imagine two bowls falling off of the same table, you might see one shatter into a million pieces while the other has one giant clean break. We can't change how we break in life. The brain processes trauma differently for everyone, and one person with a more minor traumatic event might shatter. At the same time, someone with a devastating past experiences a clean break. Psychologists don't really know why this happens. Still, it is empirically true that the brains of two different people have the exact same reaction even though the circumstances are different.
Don't ever let someone invalidate you by saying someone always has it worse. It's not supported by objective evidence. Your feelings are your own, and you owe others nothing in regard to an explanation.
We cannot control how we break. We can choose to work on it and get help, but there might be a million pieces lost. Whether you are leaping or tip-toeing, please know your steps matter—every single one. You can't get to the finish line if you refuse to move at all.
Always allow yourself to feel. It's okay if you barely moved and feel dumb. Process it, and be proud of yourself for not being too proud of the baby steps. There are so many different ways to accomplish your dream, if others can do it, so can you! Even if it looks different than the way others do it.
